Age, Beauty and Money…And What does Life Mean Anyway?
Much has been written in the media
about the "post 50 invisible woman". It has been said that women of a certain age fade
into the woodwork or fall out of favor as they age. Well
that is not completely
true. I mean take a look at some of the
hot 50 something women in Hollywood: Michelle Pfeiffer (57), Christie Brinkley
(61), Heather Locklear (54). Of course, as I look longingly at them and their
bodies, I silently swear off carbs and I desperately want their money to do
whatever it is they do.
But the reality is that I am a “regular”
almost 50 woman. Pretty in a cute way. Forever
trying to take off the baby weight, but in all honesty…I have always had curves
and I will probably die with curves. I
am just your normal run of the mill woman who is also lucky to have a good job,
an education…more than so many women on this planet. Yet, here I am feeling dissatisfied.
I am no different than many women or
men it would seem in Western culture. We
just murmur…what now?
So it began on Friday night. Maybe
I was feeling a little bit of that. Dissatisfied,
mind unable to turn off. As I “left the office” Friday night, work seemed to
infiltrate my thoughts. I was planning
reports in my mind, directions for projects…and my inside voice was yelling…”STOP
the Music!” I am still young enough to
have fun. I wanted to stomp my feet “where is my fun!” Saturday could not have
been more opposite. I did not want to
get out of bed even though every time I fell back into a restless sleep, my
dreams were borderline psychotic. Well
it seemed that way to me. It seemed like
everyone that I had come across in life showed up in my dreams. I think at one point I might have even had a
baby (I know, at my age….very highly unlikely and completed weird).
I finally headed out about 8 pm Saturday
night just looking for some normality in my weekend. A slice of pizza (I was out of food – oh ya…there
goes the “I am giving up carbs promise”) and I thought a tea in a coffee shop
might help me settle. I took a look at
the reports....put those away and then just randomly searched pretty well everything…and finally headed
home. Yep, 10 pm, only two hours out of
the house.
But it wasn’t a useless trip. I ran into some people and had some fun
conversation. I checked out hotels for
our coming family reunion. And I can say
I got out of bed on a Saturday! But sometimes it makes me think I might be
still be fading into the woodwork.
So here I am on Sunday. I must admit, the desire to stay in bed has dissipated. I have found my way to a Sunday brunch (yep…still
no food). And I am writing.
I think when it comes right down to it…life
is just not always “interesting”. Sure
last week I took a cooking class in making “gourmet pizza” but one is not going
to that every weekend. In another week, I am signed up for a “painting
class”. They have promised me I can
paint an “impressionist” painting. In an
hour an a half ….for $25 including materials no less. They obviously have greater hopes than I know
I am going to achieve. However, for $25
I will have art for my wall. Who knows,
I could be the next Picasso.
Life is funny. Is it a western world phenomenon we must do
something “important” all the time. But you the reality is that I did important
things. I got caught up on sleep. I
treated myself to brunch out. I got
caught up with friends. I even think
some guy from the coffee shop was checking me out!
No, I will never be a “hot 50
something Hollywood babe”. But who says
they aren’t sitting home on Friday night or wishing they could stay in bed all
Saturday. And while the entire world may
worship them, my life is not that bad. I actually experienced conversations
with people whose eyes lit up when they saw me.
And in the recent words of Jane Goodall (the world's foremost
expert on chimpanzees
– hey if you don’t know her…try “google”) who
happened to visit my hometown recently, “Each day, every one of us can make a
difference”.
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